Wednesday, March 13, 2019

Finally Doing MCU: Phase One

A (mostly) first look at the films of the Marvel Cinematic Universe.
Part I. Phase One.

Iron Man*
dir. Jon Favreau, 2008

I remember how badass the trailer for this movie was. Everybody was pumped! I didn't even know who the hell Iron Man even was. I just thought, and think, Robert Downey, Jr. is a badass. And he is. That it is also very HARD ROCK ride with a dude made of METAL! is just an added bonus. The suits, all of the iterations, RULE! And this is a movie, even a character, that is fully about a suit. How putting on masks splits your identity and you either roll with it or you hide behind it. I like the bold move on Marvel's part to know what!? Our movies exist in a world where superheroes are the shit! Cool early late-Jeff Bridges performances. He really works as a bearded, bald villain. Pro delivery. Gwyneth Paltrow is a freckle-cheeked goddess.

The Incredible Hulk
dir. Louis Leterrier, 2008

This movie is an ugly veiny piece of excrement that seems to have been directed by a passionless turd. Ed Norton could've been right for this part. Instead, he and his arrogance and rewrites got in his way. Thus, this movie isn't right for anybody. I honestly don't even remember anything that happens, except the weird soda factory blood drop thing that goes nowhere.

Iron Man 2
dir. Jon Favreau, 2010

Here's a movie that follows up a shitty movie that followed up a badass movie that begs the question: Should we actually give a hot damn about Iron Man? Like, are we supposed to care? This movie is like watching someone take a hundred million dollars cash, dump it in a warehouse, then shred and burn it. Mickey Rourke as that nuts-ass villain though. And I would've given Sam Rockwell's spray tan Best Supporting Actor.

dir. Kenneth Branagh, 2011

This movie SLAPS! The moment when Thor gets his hammer back is one of the most satisfying moments ever committed to film. Odin's single tear. Natalie Portman being hot. Kat Dennings being hotter. Hemsworth being hotter than everybody who ever lived. Stellan SkarsgĂ„rd being all funny and science-y. All those dutch angles. All that weird space shit I usually hate. Man! I love this movie. How even does this happen? I can't wait for the other Thors. 

Captain America: The First Avenger*
dir. Joe Johnston, 2011

The first hour is a masterpiece. Agent Carter is the love of my life. Chris Evans is sooooo great in this role. The little guy stuff. Tucci. The flagpole bit. World War II stuff! The second hour is, well, I don't know. I just don't know. It's got that mean red guy and a bunch of action sequences that seem to just all be the same. 

Marvel's The Avengers
dir. Joss Whedon, 2012
★★★★ 1/2

When Iron Man comes home to Pepper (Gwyneth!!) and the suit comes off piece-by-peice, I was over on my chair pumping my fist. Such badass. Then, the flying suit-up! The stuff with the Iron Man suit is just. so. good! Then, you have all that fun dialogue between Tony and Banner (Ruffalo is such a strong pull!) and then Tony and Cap. The dialogue in this movie sings, man. And I could watch Whedon tear New York City apart with computers any day.

Okay. I get it. I'm in. Let's get on to Phase Two!!



  1. Love this post! Thor was the first MCU movie that I really loved, and I've made sure I've seen every one at the cinema ever since. They're just such entertaining movies!

    1. Thanks! Right on. Really looking forward to the rest and the Thors, especially.

  2. The sheen of The Avengers has faded with even bigger follow-up films (notably Civil War and Infinity War), but I still remember how awesome it was seeing them all together for the first time.

    1. Looking forward to seeing the later Avengers together movies.

  3. A bit surprised at Thor is your top rated movie in this group, but only because most tend to rank it near the bottom of this same group. Love your reasoning though, especially Kat Dennings. Rawr! Jokes aside, glad you're enjoying the MCU, so far.